On turning 18 / etc

According to Kimberley Crossman's twitter, as much of an authority in my life as wikipedia, today is Shortland Street's 18th birthday. Happy birthday, Shortland Street! You're 18! Let's go to Shadz or something!

As a special birthday gift to Sh St, I shall try to write in this blog more often, starting today, and rejecting all fears of 'oh but this is too boring/inconsequential to write down' which have slowed up the blog so far. Most of the internet is too boring/inconsequential to write down.

Anyways, less writing about the internet, more writing about Shortland St. I've got to say I am positively dreading the next developments in the Loren>Daniel "you knocked me up" storyline. If the promo ads are anything to go by, at least. Not surprising that Daniel is bummed about Loren choosing, well, ANYTHING without his input, let alone an abortion, but sad that Sh St is putting Daniel's feelings on an even keel with Loren's in this plot - it really does look like one of those 'who do you side with?' dealios Sh St likes to throw out there from time to time with Big Issues, and I don't think they should really be doing that with abortion. I was already getting annoyed enough with Maxwell, you know, yelling at him and hoping he'd hear through the TV, etc. His situation with his ex and their kid is a sad one but is not the same as Daniel's situation with Loren and the zygote. AT ALL. Obvs. Yet that's how Maxwell's playing it. So, once more for good measure, SHUT UP, MAXWELL.

On a note of similar importance, "you knocked me up" was a great line. Let's watch this space and hope Daniel isn't as much of a douche as the ad makes out...

I was beginning to really like Daniel - and Maxwell. Now I'm likely gonna end up rooting (yup) for Sarah and TK to get back together.

Speaking of rooting, and TK, and recent weeks' events, boy am I glad he and Brooke have finally broken up. Of course. Everyone's glad about that. But had you all noticed that, save for hospital scenes (just), every single Brooke+TK scene was either immediately pre- or post-coital? Like, flushed faces and tousled hair and dishevelled clothes all round? It was getting a bit gross, and I ain't no prude. It was beginning to... shame them both.

One more thing: I had kinda been hoping the mystery blackmailer would turn out to be Ash the Struwwelpeter-ish (see below) academic, playing some sort of philosophically excellent mind game with Kieran. I like him, as I'd like any sort of academic superhero in dated hipster garb making waaaaay too much eye contact for comfort.

on the surgical removal of the personalities of shortland street's teenage girl characters when confronted with frosty-tipped old dude love interests

Some people call it 'maturing', this sudden replacement of a girl's interests and well-defined character traits with a nervous attention to make-up, dresses and creepy older dudes. I suspect a lot of these people are Shortie writers and the devout scribes who tend the character profiles on Wikipedia. But isn't it really just a convenient way to never bother continuing with the good work that's gone in to character development, since a scandalous older guy/teenage girl affair is going to be easier to dramatise? Never mind how boring it might be, no matter how many times it's been done before, and regardless of what awesomeness might be eroded in the process?

In other words, I wish Scarlett had dressed up as Richard Hadlee at every damn party ever. And that maybe even a ten second dialogue had pretended to explain why Delphi suddenly went from 'yuk, dresses' to 'OMG hope I'm sexay layday enough for this creep who likes to murder people while listening to the Chills' in, like, one episode. And, just to prove this isn't all about me wanting Shortland St packed to the gills with baby dykes in cricket drag, I miss Sophie's earnest blogging days very much. If you can think of any other examples, comment away!

As much as I enjoy Shortland Street dearly and have its writers to thank for more hours' entertainment in my life than I really care to calculate, there are times it has seemed as if writers are out to sabotage the development of characters they weren't responsible for themselves. Sometimes an episode comes up that you could swear was written out of contempt for all the characters. Always, at some point when a teenage girl character is involved, somebody makes the dull decision that it's goodbye cricket/rugby/MyLife, hello Dom/Kieran/weird misguided lady hormones thrown all over the show. Yaaaaawwwwn. Sophie in highskool blogger mode would have probably found Sophie:2010 quite insipid.

I'll hasten to add here I see nothing wrong in the slightest with femme-ness (whatever you might see that to mean), female sexuality, black dresses, necklaces, mini skirts, boyfriend shirts** or anything else in that Thin Lizzy ad. Nor is there anything wrong with teenage girls hooking up with whoever they like. My beef here is with the insinuation that the way each of these girl characters started out was 'immature', a phase, with its logical termination coming in the form of some irresistable specimen of manhood accidentally flicking the 'young lady' switch.

I've grown up watching these characters - and while sitting around from 7 to 7:30 waiting to see a damn fine representation of yourself on tv2 would be a waste of time even if you were Harry, it has always felt disappointing to see this same thing happen over and over with SS' teenage girls. Seeing representations of not necessarily yrself, but what yr about, is a big deal when you're young (and, really, at any age) - after a while, watching all these teen girl outsider/nerd/tomboy characters magically morph into vain materialism, usually for the benefit of a plotline concerning how badass the older dude is - as if that was just what girls do - you realise it's a sad betrayal of the characters, and anyone who liked them the way they were.





*Scarlett Valentine was not such a clear-cut case of this - her and Eti were cute together after all, aye.
** OK, there is something wrong with boyfriend shirts: the name - it's just a baggy shirt... but I digress.